- Forum Clout
- 12,603
To get my walk on!
-
Reminder: Do not call, text, or mention harrassing someone in real life. Do not encourage it. Do not talk about killing or using violence against anyone, or engaging in any criminal behavior. If it is not an obvious joke even when taken out of context, don't post it. Please report violators.
DMCA, complaints, and other inquiries:
[email protected]
I’m setting the alarm for 5:45 am…
- Thread starter Nigger John
- Start date
- Forum Clout
- 49,446
you spelled "cock on!" wrong
- Forum Clout
- 12,603
My cocks always on me
- Forum Clout
- 49,446
You never leave it at home when you go on the bus? Just to make sure you don't lose it?
- Forum Clout
- 48,003
Do you use a generic alarm, Nigger Jim?
I personally use G Code by the Geto Boys to wake up
I personally use G Code by the Geto Boys to wake up
- Forum Clout
- 116,305
I don't know what the fuck is going on. It's 2am here. I woke up at 12am and I feel like I slept all night. I don't know when I went to sleep but it had to have been around 10. I drank 12 beers and had a big fire. I don't understand what the fuck is happening. I'm wide awake, totally sober and I feel great.
- Forum Clout
- 116,305
I never use music I like as a ring tone anymore because I end up being annoyed by it. My ring tone used to be the guitar solo from Stokin' the Neighbors by Lagwagon and Verne Troyer cumming. I remember going to the drunk tank one night and people were calling me incessantly and the ringer was on full volume. It was fucking maddening.
- Forum Clout
- 20,460
How was your walk?
- Forum Clout
- 84,194
Blacking out on 12 beers? Rookie numbers.
- Forum Clout
- 8,288
my ringtone used to be kernkraft 400 when I was a teenager and it permanently ruined the song for me. using anything but a default ringtone seems a bit embarrassing now, tbqhwy
- Forum Clout
- 50,692
I woke up this morning
with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again
This happens all the time
It's detachable
This comes in handy a lot of the time
I can leave it home when I think
it's going to get me in trouble
Or I can rent it out
when I don't need it
But now and then I go to a party
Get drunk
And the next the morning,
I can't for the life of me
Remember what I did with it
First I looked around my apartment
And I couldn't find it
So I called up the place
where the party was
They hadn't seen it either
I asked them to check
the medicine cabinet
'Cause for some reason I
leave it there sometimes
But not this time
So I told them if it
pops up to let me know
I called a few people
who were at the party
But they were no help either
I was starting to get desperate
I really don't like being
without my penis for too long
It makes me feel like less of a man
And I really hate to having to sit down
Every time I take a leak
After a few hours of searching the house
And calling everyone I could think of
I was starting to get very depressed
So I went to the Kiev and ate breakfast
Then as I walked down Second
Avenue toward St. Mark's Place
Where all those people sell used
books and other junk on the street
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven
Some guy was selling it
I had to buy it off him
He wanted 22 bucks but
I talked him down to 17
I took it home, washed it off
And put it back on
I was happy again, complete
People sometimes tell me
I should get it permanently
attached but I don't know
Even though sometimes
it's a pain in the ass
I like having a detachable penis
- Forum Clout
- 12,603
Putting shoes on now!
- Forum Clout
- 50,692
That is gonna be a nice fucken walk I’d be jealous but I’m going to the beach tomorrow.
- Forum Clout
- 116,305
I didn't black out I just went to sleep.
- Forum Clout
- 84,194
You literally said that you don’t remember when you went to bed.
- Forum Clout
- 12,603
Great fucking walk! Would of went longer but have a meeting
- Forum Clout
- 4,331
Well that ones way to make it to work at 9am on time.
- Forum Clout
- 116,305
I don't know what time it was. I remember doing it.