• Reminder: Do not call, text, or mention harrassing someone in real life. Do not encourage it. Do not talk about killing or using violence against anyone, or engaging in any criminal behavior. If it is not an obvious joke even when taken out of context, don't post it. Please report violators.

    DMCA, complaints, and other inquiries:

    [email protected]

"I used to be a tin knocker, but wont get involved in my own home's construction"

Forum Clout
53,142
Joe once proudly mentioned on the show that he stole from work and he beat a lie detector test when questioned. He told it like it was some big achievement to beat a lie detector test but he is such an idiot and devoid of any deep, intellectual thoughts that they were probably unable to detect any brain activity from that bovine brain of his.
Joe is legitimately proud of having "gotten one over" on a local small business, probably owned by some guy who actually cared about his reputation. The Qmias are proud of fucking over this local small business owner, for the crime of expecting them to work for their salary. Not even a shred of conscience between them, either. To them it's just a hilarious old anecdote.
 

Stent

cause you know it don't matter anyway
Forum Clout
31,320
The fact Joe insists he beat a lie detector test while staring at a doorknob makes me question the validity of that story. I also doubt it because he's a lying piece of shit.

At least the builders at Nana's new place don't have an elderly queer mincing about watching them while sipping on a mai tai. "You boys sure get sweaty in this heat. I should've had the pool put in first! You're all invited back anytime of course!"
 
Forum Clout
53,142
The fact Joe insists he beat a lie detector test while staring at a doorknob makes me question the validity of that story. I also doubt it because he's a lying piece of shit.

At least the builders at Nana's new place don't have an elderly queer mincing about watching them while sipping on a mai tai. "You boys sure get sweaty in this heat. I should've had the pool put in first! You're all invited back anytime of course!"
"No, no, NO!" hissed Andy at the African-American worker. "I want more varnish on those banisters! There's no SPARKLE!" he cattily fumed.

"Yes'um Mr. Andy, yes'um, sir. But thing is, that wood thar ain't but gonna get no shinier, sir. That thar's Carolina pine, if you wants shine you done best go wit Carolina spruce, cuz that Carolina spruces sure shines up nice, Mr. Andy!"

"Fucking n******. Yes Remus, whatever, pine, spruce, I HAAAAAAATE this stuff and usually have people handling for me. But I want this house to SCREAM "Andy Espresso", do you understand? Because I am Andy Espresso!". Mincing with hands on hips, Andy lisped "Just make the FUCKING banister shine, OK Remus? For fuck's sake, they aren't even people! No wonder construction is taking so long!"

Andy sashayed his way into his new toy room, and eyed his new custom karaoke stage. "Wait til Gavin sees this, tee hee!". Andy pranced his way to the stage like Nureyev, and twirled with delight. "I'm truly at home here", he pondered, as he began to vamp and flounce, making delicate fruity hand gestures with his free hand, while daintily clutching his beer with the other. "I should get cigars for Gavin. I can't WAIT til he gets here! We're gonna have so much fun!". Suddenly Andy's state of reverie was interrupted by one of the workers.

"Mr. Andy sir, you didn't stand on that thar karaoke stage, did ya? Cause we just done varnished that stage down round but a half hour ago!"

Andy gasped in horror. "The stage! It's ruined! It's ruined! It'll have no glide now! AND MY ORTHOPEDIC SNEAKERS! COCK! DIDN'T YOU EVER HEAR OF WET PAINT SIGNS!". "I hate these fucking n****** so much, ugh why did I move down to N*****ville in the first place? What was I thinking? What if Gavin never comes? What if Gavin NEVER COMES?".
 

Stent

cause you know it don't matter anyway
Forum Clout
31,320
"No, no, NO!" hissed Andy at the African-American worker. "I want more varnish on those banisters! There's no SPARKLE!" he cattily fumed.

"Yes'um Mr. Andy, yes'um, sir. But thing is, that wood thar ain't but gonna get no shinier, sir. That thar's Carolina pine, if you wants shine you done best go wit Carolina spruce, cuz that Carolina spruces sure shines up nice, Mr. Andy!"

"Fucking n******. Yes Remus, whatever, pine, spruce, I HAAAAAAATE this stuff and usually have people handling for me. But I want this house to SCREAM "Andy Espresso", do you understand? Because I am Andy Espresso!". Mincing with hands on hips, Andy lisped "Just make the FUCKING banister shine, OK Remus? For fuck's sake, they aren't even people! No wonder construction is taking so long!"

Andy sashayed his way into his new toy room, and eyed his new custom karaoke stage. "Wait til Gavin sees this, tee hee!". Andy pranced his way to the stage like Nureyev, and twirled with delight. "I'm truly at home here", he pondered, as he began to vamp and flounce, making delicate fruity hand gestures with his free hand, while daintily clutching his beer with the other. "I should get cigars for Gavin. I can't WAIT til he gets here! We're gonna have so much fun!". Suddenly Andy's state of reverie was interrupted by one of the workers.

"Mr. Andy sir, you didn't stand on that thar karaoke stage, did ya? Cause we just done varnished that stage down round but a half hour ago!"

Andy gasped in horror. "The stage! It's ruined! It's ruined! It'll have no glide now! AND MY ORTHOPEDIC SNEAKERS! COCK! DIDN'T YOU EVER HEAR OF WET PAINT SIGNS!". "I hate these fucking n****** so much, ugh why did I move down to N*****ville in the first place? What was I thinking? What if Gavin never comes? What if Gavin NEVER COMES?".
Even Liberace would be thinking "Enough already, faggot."
 
G

guest

Guest
Imagine some Bernie Mac looking mofo is the Sheriff of Greenville PD:

"I say, I say esxcuuuuuus me sir...we got here a ordnance complaint, you betta keep all dat prancing, mincing and sashay-ing at bay, boy, or i reckon the neighbors gonna take care of ya and I's be looking the other way cuz I done HATE niggers like yew, u hear me"
 

LAZERBEAMZ

Forum Clout
1,940
And nana did it like an idiot (or more likely like a desperate broke person) He unloaded a 10,000 sf house for a huge loss, crammed whatever guido crap he could salvage into a tiny apartment in NY and waited 1.5 years for his house to get built. How long do you think he waited for his McMansion to get built back when he had money? That thing was slapped together in 8 months
It didn't matter anyways. I remember Anthony talking about how he and Melinda lived around the boxes the movers left in the middle of the living room when the moved in, for literal years. It wasn't until she left him and he started dating Nicolini that he hired Keith's wife to unpack all his things.

Millionaire nigger lived like he was squatting in a crack den.
 

JebJoh

Forum Clout
13,015
It didn't matter anyways. I remember Anthony talking about how he and Melinda lived around the boxes the movers left in the middle of the living room when the moved in, for literal years. It wasn't until she left him and he started dating Nicolini that he hired Keith's wife to unpack all his things.

Millionaire nigger lived like he was squatting in a crack den.
You can take the nana out of the ghetto but you can’t take the ghetto out of nana.
 
Top