NYC stories 3

[CQ Beans]

That’s not very neighborly, cuz

CHH will never be my neighbor. It’s against my religion.

 

[CQ Beans]

Any people say coprophilia is weird.. imagine being into this:

Nice ‘and’ you filthy flakey faggot.

 

[BrotherMan1488]

(1) This chick I used to know from the suburbs hooked me up with this girl from Queens once. Went fine the first time around. She calls me up after about two weeks talking about [insert female nonsense] and going out for drinks. She then starts attempting to bomb me with booze and I start stopping her.

Now like a faggot simp I have to drag her to the local thoroughfare but not before she gets a kiss. And by kiss I mean tongue in bar fly mouth. I could tell she was putting on by how she was acting. Kinda stumpy but a possible lay but no just fucking no. The Irishmen at the local garbage dump agreed: not good. Not good.

(2) So apparently there’s a surplus of homeless people and not so homeless people in my neighborhood who are able to afford walk up apartments. This giant vested old woman asks me to help her into her apartment.

And because I’m CQ (retarded) I go’ Um, ok.’ This is three flights of an old school NY apartment and I’m badly hungover in humid weather. I start to get the feeling this broad doesn’t belong here and kind of linger by the staircase.

She just stares at me like I’m plotting to break into her apartment before the door opens. This isn't reading like I thought it would but I just felt creeped out as fuck as if I let a Djinn into someone’s building. Still have no idea who that woman was and never seen her since.

(3)Walking down Main Street and I get greeted by some negro kid screaming,’ Fuck that, fuck it!’ kicking over bar and restaurant outside chalk boards. ‘Ain’t shit! Fuck it!’ Despite agreeing with him I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. He did this weird twirl a world shucky ducky kick to each of the signs before heading off the to corner pass. Haven’t seen him since.

When did you eat Chop Cheeeee?

 

[CQ Beans]

When did you eat Chop Cheeeee?

When I was in Brooklyn. Was even bettah.

 

[Total Tranny Death]

I spent the first 25 years of my life less than an hour from NYC, and I've probably been there less than 10 times. There's nowhere to piss, and all it is is overpriced bars and restaurants owned and operated by wealthy foreigners who think the definition of "making it" is owning a business in NYC that loses a quarter million a year. I guess there are a few overpriced hotels and apartment buildings owned by kikes as well. I think the last time I went there was St. Patrick's Day with my friend. We went "bar hopping" and I actually had a fairly decent time. At like 1am we ran into a group of Indian guys who were dressed in tuxedos and had gallons of cologne on them. They stopped to talk to us and were extremely overly nice to us to the point of it weirding us out. I thought they were headed to a wedding or something, then I realized that they were out trying to get laid and they think that the way to do that is by dressing in a tuxedo and putting on a gallon of cologne and going out to bars and talking to random people and eventually someone will spread their legs for them.

 

[CQ Beans]

I spent the first 25 years of my life less than an hour from NYC, and I've probably been there less than 10 times. There's nowhere to piss, and all it is is overpriced bars and restaurants owned and operated by wealthy foreigners who think the definition of "making it" is owning a business in NYC that loses a quarter million a year. I guess there are a few overpriced hotels and apartment buildings owned by kikes as well. I think the last time I went there was St. Patrick's Day with my friend. We went "bar hopping" and I actually had a fairly decent time. At like 1am we ran into a group of Indian guys who were dressed in tuxedos and had gallons of cologne on them. They stopped to talk to us and were extremely overly nice to us to the point of it weirding us out. I thought they were headed to a wedding or something, then I realized that they were out trying to get laid and they think that the way to do that is by dressing in a tuxedo and putting on a gallon of cologne and going out to bars and talking to random people and eventually someone will spread their legs for them.

So did you fuck the Indian guys or not? I’m just saying I know some guys from Jackson Heights who could use the action. Binu, Piyash, all good guys.