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Poutine is a straight man's meal

Turry Fawks

Turry Fawks

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TheGhostOfAbeVigoda said:
Seriously, if you don't like poutine you've only had shitty ones. It's so simple but there definitely are ways to fuck it up and a lot people do.
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It's gotta be from a fawkin greasy spoon diner or some other Canadian SOUUUULLLLL food type establishment. These HOMOS (@BonnieMcFarlaneMe2 no offense) get it from Rotten Ronnie's or fawkin 711 and then they talk shit
 
TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

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Turry Fawks said:
It's gotta be from a fawkin greasy spoon diner or some other Canadian SOUUUULLLLL food type establishment. These HOMOS (@BonnieMcFarlaneMe2 no offense) get it from Rotten Ronnie's or fawkin 711 and then they talk shit
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Pizza places are pretty hit or miss but some of them really fucking nail it. If I ever order a poutine and I'm given a pile of fries with gravy poured only on the top and sprinkled with shredded cheese I get legitimately pouty and I think like "What the fuck am I supposed to do with this shit?" And I just eat the ones that have gravy on them and then throw the rest out.
 
Turry Fawks

Turry Fawks

Dean of Dog Piss Studies at Waterlooniversity
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TheGhostOfAbeVigoda said:
Pizza places are pretty hit or miss but some of them really fucking nail it. If I ever order a poutine and I'm given a pile of fries with gravy poured only on the top and sprinkled with shredded cheese I get legitimately pouty and I think like "What the fuck am I supposed to do with this shit?" And I just eat the ones that have gravy on them and then throw the rest out.
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Worst I ever had was stringy fries with a kraft single thrown on top with vegetable gravy. It was enough to commit a hate crime on that Vietnamese restaurant but I was only twelve and @NoBacon hadn't taught me what it means to be a huwhite man yet.
 
TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

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Turry Fawks said:
Worst I ever had was stringy fries with a kraft single thrown on top with vegetable gravy. It was enough to commit a hate crime on that Vietnamese restaurant but I was only twelve and @NoBacon hadn't taught me what it means to be a huwhite man yet.
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That's honestly fucking insane and I'm sure somebody killed those people. I get mad enough about shredded cheese. It ruins my day. I can't even imagine that shit. I'd kill myself.

Fuck anything that isn't just fries, actual poutine gravy and curd. Even the ones that try to get all fancy with it and add a bunch of unnecessary shit. My ex came home one time and was like "I got you a bacon poutine" and I was almost like "Well shove it up your ass then, BITCH. YOU'RE RUINING MY LIFE!"
 
TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

TheGhostOfAbeVigoda

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Lamont & Tonelli said:
Explain this, please. Is there some special poutine-only gravy? I had A&W's version of poutine, seemed like normal brown beef stock gravy. I imagine a real Maple-blooded Canadian would pooh-pooh it, but I thought it was PFG.
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Plain ol beef gravy is serviceable, but poutine gravy is something different. I'm not a saucier or a gravy doctor so I don't actually know the answer. I think it might be made out of missing native women.
 
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