I’m drinking with colleagues and just turned down sex. (Yes, really)

[TheGhostOfBernellTrammell]

Did she ask to come round your flat before or after you explained how civil unrest is inevitable and the collapse is imminent

 

[NoBacon]

And when you said you turned it down you meant you got pozzed

I turned it down because I have mastered my lust. You should try and do the same thing.

 

[Turry Fawks]

I turned it down because I have mastered my lust. You should try and do the same thing.

I'm married though.

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

Anyway, she was reasonably hot and asked if she could spend the night at mine and “corrupt me” - I was flirting and playing it all up.

ok, I hadn't read this properly before... but if a girl said THAT - I'm going home with her. The end.

 

[NoBacon]

I'm married though.

What’s his name?

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

I turned it down because I have mastered my lust. You should try and do the same thing.

Have you told that little faggot here to stop flirting yet? That'd be a start

maybe stop flashing your cum-covered shorts. You both need God to smite you.


Observe the non-answer, very telling of what this story was meant for.

 

[Turry Fawks]

What’s his name?

Men can't get married, heretic

 

[TheGhostOfAbeVigoda]

nah, I believe she left you to go home alone (as you should've)

Anyway, cool story, bro'

I doubt Sue Lightning will be impressed by this lie... you should've taken the chance & fucked him last year: 'oOoH, we're just like each other but different'... yeh, both stupidly verbose lying idiots. I hope there's some ironically adjacent fires which you both die in, maybe on the way to verbosely chat about dorky stuff, but God threw a D20 & you both caught fire. LOL

Lol mean Toss__Pot rules. Are you feeling any better?

 

[BUBBLER]

“made the sign of the cross to her.”

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

Lol mean Toss__Pot rules. Are you feeling any better?

slightly babe, I'm getting there

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

He actually did go round & his friend recorded it from the closet (ironic), but then he was fucking her ass & puked, then his friend puked too & fell out of the cupboard, then the dog puked & she left wrapped in a bedsheet but crashed into a shop window - but there was never any police report.

The moral of this story is that @NoBacon is still a sex-haver... & definitely ISN'T just trying to impress men on here so he can re-live his reddit fedora days

 

[chocolatehellhole]

And you came here to tell us? Man you are one sad sack of shit

@NoBacon saved my life on a female piloted airplane, be respectful alright.

 

[LockedHDD__Pot]

@NoBacon saved my life on a female piloted airplane, be respectful alright.

your wife let you back online? cool!

 

[BoringFaggot]

Why exactly didn't you do it? Just because she has pink hair and you think she's a psycho?

 

[johnnynoname]

i believe that OP turned down sex because niggas on here old enough where sex just gets in the way of playing skyrim, and reading Mark Waid's Fantastic Four Run


however, I don't believe that anyone on this forum has colleagues....fuck outta here

 

[Patty's Stubby Fingers]

I got talking to some pink haired teacher who asked if it was “safe” to talk to me because she couldn’t find her friends.

I said “safe enough” and we had a flirtatious back and forth, where she told me about her polyamorous relationship, and showed me photos of her girlfriend. She said she would be my worse nightmare and I said my mom warned me about girls like her. All sexually charged shit, the more I mocked her the more into it she got.

Anyway, she was reasonably hot and asked if she could spend the night at mine and “corrupt me” - I was flirting and playing it all up.

I wised up and just went home and made the sign of the cross to her.

I realise everybody will think this is fan fiction and bullshit, but it’s not. It literally just happened.

I’m wise enough to avoid these things now, and she was so drunk she asked what my name was about 10 times, and it’s a very common white guy name. Definitely dodged a crazy bullet. I’m also quite sick atm and don’t think I could have performed anyway, I feel completely dead after 5 drinks.

You sure showed that cunt

 

[Patty's Stubby Fingers]

I turned it down because I have mastered my lust. You should try and do the same thing.

Did you bring up "them"?

i believe that OP turned down sex because niggas on here old enough where sex just gets in the way of playing skyrim, and reading Mark Waid's Fantastic Four Run


however, I don't believe that anyone on this forum has colleagues....fuck outta here

Nigga Skyrim sucks ass play Morrowind

 

[ミスタースパーコル]

So it was Emilio

Gaymy

 

[BonnieMcFarlaneMe2]

i believe that OP turned down sex because niggas on here old enough where sex just gets in the way of playing skyrim, and reading Mark Waid's Fantastic Four Run


however, I don't believe that anyone on this forum has colleagues....fuck outta here

Isn’t half the fun of being a waiter going out to drink afterwards with the waitresses?

 

[Smeckler's Powder]

You forgot to mention she was ugly